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Seven Ways Insecurity Is Revealed

Certainly, the biggest recipe for failure that almost all of us face is insecurity. It can manifest itself in many ways. Although one person’s insecurity might force him or her into isolation, or keep that person from pursuing opportunities he or she would be well-suited for, another person might combat his or her insecurity by taking the opposite approach and becoming too verbose, or even a blowhard. Obviously, to be a Warrior, you ultimately have to conquer your insecurities—or at least learn to manage them. But one of the most disheartening things I have observed watching many friends, family, and employees is the terrible limitations their insecurities place on many of them. These insecurities typically lead to one of the following approaches:

1.    Having Extreme Risk Aversion. For some people, even though you might have the talent and the resources to make something happen, your insecurities won’t allow you to take even a modicum of risk.

2.    Going into Hiding. We all have coworkers, schoolmates, or even family members who might be around us but are barely noticed. They quietly stay in the background, or they often simply choose not to attend functions that they would enjoy or would otherwise benefit them, just because of their insecurities.

3.    Slipping into the “Big Freeze.” I have seen this happen to my most talented employees. It occurs when someone who has progressed tremendously in his career suffers from enormous insecurity issues.

4.    Babbling. I have frequently seen otherwise talented people fall to their insecurities during tense moments in the workplace, and for some reason, they feel a need to fill any silence with often nonsensical chatter.

5.    Playing the Passive/Aggressive Game. Insecure people often dance around the real issue and take a convoluted approach toward achieving their goals. Instead of going to the boss and saying, “Here is all the progress I have made this year; here is what I did to improve the company; and accordingly, here is the raise I think I deserve and is justified,” they play emotional games or sometimes even have others plead their case.

6.    Adopting a “Tough Guy” Approach. This occurs when someone trie to mask their insecurities by being overly tough. Equating to abrupt or even  busive behavior towards people in order to hide your own feelings of self-doubt. This is always a bad idea.

7.    Overcompensating. Often, the most insecure person in the room is the one with the biggest mouth. To combat their insecurities, many people choose to become overly aggressive—or blowhards who are difficult to trust.

 

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