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Why Sam Adams Should Really Resign. And What Would Your Porno Name Be?

We are in the midst of our own little sleazy political drama in my hometown of Portland, OR. Our newly elected mayor, Sam Adams, recently confessed to having sex with a an eighteen year boy.  Sam was one of the nation’s only openly gay mayors, so the prospect of sex with another male was not a suprise.  However, during the campaign Sam had strongly denied accusations of the affair, which started when the boy came to Sam for advice when he was only seventeen.  In a very Clinton-like declaration, Sam explained that he had only kissed the boy when he was seventeen, and waited until he was legal age to really get busy.

This is disappointing on many levels.  I like Sam Adams, and have supported him throughout his political career, including making some large donations.  I think he would have made a great mayor if this had not occurred.  He is full of energy and terrific ideas.  I am also generally pretty liberal about people’s sexual activities, and for the most part I think we should stay out of politician’s private lives.  But I don’t think a 40-something year old should be using their position of power to seduce a 17 year old – be they gay or straight.  Despite the “Lolita-like” allegations that have been made about Sam’s young lover, he was a kid and not capable of making intelligent choices.  Sam took advantage of him.  Also, Sam lied when confronted during the campaign.  In this hopefully new and improved age of politicians we don’t need more liars.  So for the good of the city Sam should resign and not turn Portland into an Illinois suburb.

Here’s another idea. In my business when an advertiser misrepresents their product, they face legal liability.  They often need to return the purchase price to consumers and pay a fine.  Sam misprepresented himself, and since I donated to his campaign I think he should return my money. 

And even if Sam’s actions don’t bother you, you should question his judgement just based on the following. Sam’s young lover is named Beau Breedlove.  Now I am not 100% sure about this, but I believe that is his real name and not a porno moniker.  Here’s some advice; if you are having a secret affair don’t pick someone named Beau Breedlove.  It just feels too much like something from a bad movie. I would also avoid people named Dirk Diggler, Rod Hardly, Chesty Larue, Rock Hardlove, Eddie Dongster, Snatch Adams, Britney Speared, Harry Wong, Busty Hamilton, Jean Luc Prickard, Dick Street, and Forrest Hump.

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