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Stunning News! Auggie’s Dart Throwing Portfolio In The Lead!

As regular readers will remember, at the beginning of this year we decided to see if comedian Auggie Smith, who has absolutely no investment knowledge or experience, could beat the stock picking experts. After consuming several cocktails Auggie threw darts at the Wall Street Journal stock page to come up with his ten choices of the best stocks of the year.  We pitted him against Kiplinger Magazine’s “Ten Best Stocks For 2011”, and the Vanguard World Fund.

From an initial investment of $10,000 – here are the standings:

  1. Auggie’s portfolio is worth $10,720.87
  2. The Vanguard World Fund is worth $10,651.50
  3. And the Kiplinger’s stock pickers have actually found a way to lose money, with a portfolio value of $9723.40

Auggie had a few real stars in his portfolio, including IBM, which has risen over $22 a share, and Healthcare REIT, which is up almost $7 a share.  Kiplinger has a lot of dogs, with six of their ten picks declining in value.

Of course, many of you will now probably want stock picking advice from Auggie, and I am pleased to announce his unique perspective towards the financial markets is now available.  Auggie will design a custom ten stock portfolio for readers of this blog at a price far lower than other nationally-known investment professionals.  Far lower.  In fact, this is really a bargain.

If you would like a customized Auggie portfolio, just do the following:

  1. Send him a bottle of good Oregon Pinot Noir – 2008 vintage or older.  Un-opened of course.  I know how some of you are.
  2. Buy his new comedy download at iTunes – Auggie Smith’s “Smell The Thunder” – and enclose the receipt.

Auggie will drink the Pinot – and throw darts to design your custom portfolio.  And you will watch with delight as you start making all kinds of money!  Or maybe not. But it seems this would make as much sense as following the so-called experts.

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2 Responses to Stunning News! Auggie’s Dart Throwing Portfolio In The Lead!

  1. Bizzy Life Author Avatar Michelle says:

    I always knew Auggie could do it. He’s a man of many talents, now we can add dart throwing to that list!

  2. Way to go Auggie !
    This is very funny and at the same time very disturbing. I am thinking about switching my portfolio over to Auggie…looks like he is as effective as my financial advisor, but a lot funnier.

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